Friday, May 29, 2009

Wish You Could Forget

Or at least you will wish you could forget by the time I'm done with you. Buwahahah! (Oh, wait, I take back the "Buwahahah" - yes, you know who you are)

I've decided that our bodies have a sense of humor, or at least take up hobbies. Mine has one right now. It's overtime on making mucous. Oh, so lovely - I think I've gone through 3 boxes of tissues (with the lotion of course) in the last 5 days - and I'm not exaggerating which is out of character for me. So here it is. I've decided that trying to breathe while your body thinks there's nothing cooler than making snot is like trying to breathe through a straw filled with pudding. Yeah, kind of makes me want to throw up just thinking about it, but that's how it feels to me. I personally have another reason for thinking my body has a sense of humor, but I think about half of you (the guys) out there would be horrified, so I'll leave it alone. Maybe that was enough to scare the pants off you.

I'd say last but not least, but there's only time for two.

Shield your eyes.

It may hurt.

Prepare for the burn.

Whew. I'm glad that's over. Now that you're scared senseless and crying on the floor. I hope you have a great weekend. We're going to have a barbecue with Erik's coworkers tonight, so I'll be using the rest of the weekend to recuperate. (Eating ice cream and putting my feet up)

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Made Me Smile

"Jack Bower doesn't run away, he attacks in the opposite direction!"

"I have that going for me, which is nice." (Caddyshack)

"Temptation is the better part of valour." (Erik)

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Big Tipper

Haha! The title of the post just reminded me again that our upstairs neighbor's layabout 17 year old son liked to call Erik "Big Pimpin'" when we were first married. I'm not sure what he meant by that, but it was funny.

I promised that I would share some good customer services experiences in light of yesterday's negativity. Unfortunately the stories aren't that long because they don't stand out as much to me. I expect good service. When I get it, we tip well and walk away. We we get bad service it stays with me.

I will just say that some of the best service I've ever gotten has been at a fast food window. I remember specifically one day when I worked at a bank back in Topeka getting some quick lunch and being so impressed that I left the person my card and asked them to apply at the bank as a teller. From Sonic! You never know what you're going to get - it's like a surprise party.

Another time was at Spangles in Topeka (also fast food - yeah, I didn't have the best habits then) and it was almost identical. The girl was enthusiastic and happy but not annoyingly so. She really was happy to be at work taking my order. It was phenomenal. We should always treat each other that way. At least if we work in the service industry and want to keep our jobs.


Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Simple Irkings

Have you ever had a customer service experience that left you wanting to track the person down to toilet paper their house? The more logical response (and the one I most often employ) is just to repeat the horrendous experience to as many people as will listen. Before you panic, don't worry - I will do a follow up post on fantastic experiences I've had - I am still capable of enthusiasm and optimism. I will now (solely for your pleasure) tell the story of the two best worst experiences I've had. Please feel free to writhe in pain with me and shout at your computer screen as I do.

1. Autos Direct - Topeka, Kansas. No, I don't feel bad using their real names, they didn't feel it necessary to perpetuate their good name with me. I was shopping for my first car after college and stopped at this small used car lot. I was interested in a little black Honda Accord. I can't remember the year - probably late 90s. It had been owned by one person for the entire time. A little old lady named "Henrietta". Yeah right - I know a lot of little old ladies that like little black hondas with spoilers. I took it for a test drive and had Erik (still just dating at the time) take a look at it for me before I took it back. Based upon his assessment, it had been in an accident before (pulled to the right and there was evidence of a partial paint job) so he encouraged me to get a Carfax on it. When I dropped it off back at Autos Direct, I told the owner/salesman that we were concerned about a previous wreck and requested a Carfax report. He told me that I could go online and get one for myself if I desired. Basically danced around the issue and as I was leaving thought it necessary to point out that a car with over 100k miles, it was going to have issues. "Duh lizardbreath", I thought to myself. "I know it has issues, that's why I pointed them out." I didn't need help realizing that as things age (puppies, people and cars) things start falling apart on them. I did need him to admit to me that the car was still a good car though it had been in an accident. Erik went to talk to him the next morning because he's not a pushover like I am. They went for a drive so that Erik could point out the pulling to the right, etc. During the course of the exchange, the salesman became more and more defensive and at the end told Erik - "You know, I don't need your business." Well congratulations, dude. You don't have it.

2. Amarillo Mesquite Grill - Topeka, Kansas. It was a non-busy night, maybe a Thursday, I can't remember now. Erik and I went to dinner with some friends and their son. We were seated and it took maybe 5 minutes for our server to even come greet us. Then he forgot our drinks, then he forgot Gabriel's chicken strip meal - he's a little kid (5 at the time), he's hungry! It went downhill from there but the best worst part is at the end. We're ready to go, so we ask for the check. He brings it - still morose and unhelpful. I give him my debit card, Luis and Rocio were paying with cash, but they stayed with us while we waited for the receipt and sign slip to come back. It didn't. For seven minutes! They were not busy - we were some of the only customers in the restaurant that night. After that long, we snagged another server and asked him to track down my debit card. Yes, it was unattended by the credit card machine. The idiot (no, that's not too strong) server went on a smoke break while the machine dialed. We didn't see him again and certainly left him no tip. Well I guess we did leave him a tip on the signature sheet. We told him what we thought of his service and what he could have done to improve it. We watched our account for several months after that, I can't believe we didn't close it.

- Don't forget to check back for the lighter side. I expect a lot from people giving customer service, and most of the time I'm not disappointed.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Cat Out of the Bag


1. Yawn
2. Blech
3. Boo Hoo!
4. Snarl!!
5. Swoon
6. Croon
7. Repeat (in no predictable order)


1. I am sleep deprived and therefore an emotional wreck
2. I am sick and therefore an emotional wreck
3. I am doing a study on the patterns of feral animals and therefore becoming more like them
4. I am going to have a baby

If you picked 1, 2, or 4, you are right! We're going to have a baby at the end of the year! I was never any good at keeping secrets - especially about me, especially when I'm really excited about them.